$0.13

Tonight I arrived home late due to month-end activities at work and found my wife and oldest son cleaning the hardwood floors and my youngest about the home. What I did not find was dinner waiting for me. Almost 8pm, I was given two options, which at this time at night I should be grateful for, but neither was ready or close to being cooked (I believe one or both of the options was frozen).
I decided that I would drive down to the local Safeway and grab a chicken. Saying I am going to "grab a chicken" sound like I am heading out to the local Safeway in Carnation. Anyway, while I was home I had untucked my shirt, took off my phone holder, removed my tie, removed my wallet (key point here) and had a few quiet moments.
Arriving at Safeway, still untucked (very unlike me), I put in my basket a cooked chicken (only two left), two cans of tuna, and some bananas for the kids (my wife knows I can't go to the store and just purchase what I "plan" on purchasing).
As I am in one of the only two open register lines I realize that in my effort to relax at home my wallet never made it back to the best place on earth, my back pocket! In a slight panic, but more of a disappointment (because this warm chicken I have smells sooo good) I excuse myself from line (still untucked) and almost concede to the fact I am going home to thaw out dinner.
I now wrestle with the idea of placing the basket down and walking away quickly or actually walking back to the produce section for the bananas, the tuna isle and placing the chicken back on the warmer. Suddenly I think to myself, "you drove Lise's van - perhaps there is cash in the van?" I put the basket down in a "safe" place and head to the van. I find eight (8) dollars and feel like I've hit the jack-pot (a warm dinner will be mine).
I do place the bananas back and the tuna as I wondered how much this chicken was. I went to pay for it and the total came to $8.13! You've got to be kidding me! I can only image the sight I must've been to the cashier; white shirt untucked, jacket thrown on, it's 8:15pm and I am buying a cooked chicken with $8 cash and can't find a measly $0.13. Yep, this guy is single, lonely and broke!
With eyes asking for a break I say, "Ah, I can't seem to find any change in my pockets...let me run to the car and I will be right back."
The cashier says okay and I am off with thoughts in my head like, "you should've just had Lise make you the frozen stuff" and "this is ridiculous, what is $0.13 to Safeway?"
I get to the van, oh I love my wife, but it is like trying to find a needle in a haystack to find something as small as a dime in the van. The Sienna has more cup holders and storage areas than dimples on a golf ball. I find a dime, then a penny...nothing else! Now I am grabbing garbage thinking to myself that while I am looking I can be cleaning. Two cents keep me from going home empty handed...oh how I wish the Club Card had a credit limit.
I now move to the back of the van and find another dime sitting quietly on the floor. I dump the garbage in a trash can and make my way to the register. I am confused at what I see...there are four people in line, so I go to the back fully expecting to wait my turn. No...not for me tonight.
The cashier says, "Oh, there you are!" I said that I would just wait and then she says, "Oh, we've been waiting for you." My jaw drops and I am stunned (I know, this should not be stunning, but I was). I must've been gone for nearly five minutes while I was cleaning and hunting for $0.13! If I was her boss I'd be so frustrated that she did not clear the order and move on.
I said, "I am so sorry everybody, but I did not think this would happen. It was harder than I thought to find thirteen cents."
Almost everyone in line says, "What! You just needed thirteen cents?" I said yes and an older couple says I would've given you the thirteen cents.
I gave the cashier the $0.20 and then she asks; like a programed robot, "Do you want to donate a dollar to breast cancer research?" With my head down I said no and grabbed my chicken walked very quickly out of the store.
I'm pathetic!